funny quotes
------------------
funny quotes
--------------
funny quotes
--------------
funny quotes
--------------
When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years. ~Author unknown, commonly attributed to Mark Twain but no evidence has yet been found for this (Thanks, Garson O'Toole!)
--------------
First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly. ~Branch Rickey
--------------
When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. ~Mark Twain
--------------
Dad, you're someone to look up to no matter how tall I've grown. ~Author Unknown
--------------
A father carries pictures where his money used to be. ~Author Unknown
--------------
I don't care how poor a man is; if he has family, he's rich. ~M*A*S*H, Colonel Potter
--------------
Are we not like two volumes of one book? ~Marceline Desbordes-Valmore
--------------
A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again. ~Enid Bagnold
--------------
Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
--------------
May you live to be a hundred yearsWith one extra year to repent.~Author Unknown
--------------
In childhood, we yearn to be grown-ups. In old age, we yearn to be kids. It just seems that all would be wonderful if we didn't have to celebrate our birthdays in chronological order. ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com
--------------
When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years. ~Author unknown, commonly attributed to Mark Twain but no evidence has yet been found for this (Thanks, Garson O'Toole!)
--------------
Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional. ~Chili Davis
--------------
Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed. ~Charles Schulz
--------------
Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act. ~Truman Capote
--------------
A father carries pictures where his money used to be. ~Author Unknown
--------------
First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly. ~Branch Rickey
--------------
Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional. ~Chili Davis
--------------
A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip. ~Author Unknown
--------------
You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely. ~Ogden Nash
--------------
There is still no cure for the common birthday. ~John Glenn
--------------
He didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it. ~Clarence Budington Kelland
--------------
A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. ~Robert Frost
--------------
Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope. ~Bill Cosby
--------------
A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip. ~Author Unknown
--------------
Middle age is the time when a man is always thinking that in a week or two he will feel as good as ever. ~Don Marquis
--------------
There's something like a line of gold thread running through a man's words when he talks to his daughter, and gradually over the years it gets to be long enough for you to pick up in your hands and weave into a cloth that feels like love itself. ~John Gregory Brown, Decorations in a Ruined Cemetery, 1994
--------------
A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip. ~Author Unknown
--------------
Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier. ~Dan Bennett
--------------
Dad, your guiding hand on my shoulder will remain with me forever. ~Author Unknown
--------------
Dad, you're someone to look up to no matter how tall I've grown. ~Author Unknown
--------------
He didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it. ~Clarence Budington Kelland
--------------
I don't care how poor a man is; if he has family, he's rich. ~M*A*S*H, Colonel Potter
--------------
Are we not like two volumes of one book? ~Marceline Desbordes-Valmore
--------------
Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope. ~Bill Cosby
--------------
Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. ~Herbert Asquith
--------------
Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed. ~Charles Schulz
--------------
Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ~Elizabeth Stone
--------------
Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ~Elizabeth Stone
--------------
A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip. ~Author Unknown
--------------
A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip. ~Author Unknown
--------------
I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. ~George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
--------------
We advance in years somewhat in the manner of an invading army in a barren land; the age that we have reached, as the saying goes, we but hold with an outpost, and still keep open communications with the extreme rear and first beginnings of the march. ~Robert Louis Stevenson, "Virginibus Puerisque II," Virginibus Puerisque, 1881
--------------
A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. ~Robert Frost
--------------
Old as she was, she still missed her daddy sometimes. ~Gloria Naylor
--------------
Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier. ~Dan Bennett
--------------
Blessed indeed is the man who hears many gentle voices call him father! ~Lydia M. Child, Philothea: A Romance, 1836
--------------
When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years. ~Author unknown, commonly attributed to Mark Twain but no evidence has yet been found for this (Thanks, Garson O'Toole!)
--------------
Dad, your guiding hand on my shoulder will remain with me forever. ~Author Unknown
--------------
Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened. ~Jennifer Yane
No comments:
Post a Comment