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Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990
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It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. ~Phyllis Diller
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The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left. ~Jerry M. Wright
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Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician. ~Author Unknown
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I still have a full deck; I just shuffle slower now. ~Author Unknown
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He didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it. ~Clarence Budington Kelland
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Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. ~George Bernard Shaw
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Oh, the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all out, just as they are, chaff and grain together, certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and with a breath of kindness blow the rest away. ~Dinah Craik
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Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician. ~Author Unknown
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Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened. ~Jennifer Yane
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Blessed indeed is the man who hears many gentle voices call him father! ~Lydia M. Child, Philothea: A Romance, 1836
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Middle age is the time when a man is always thinking that in a week or two he will feel as good as ever. ~Don Marquis
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A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. ~Robert Frost
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It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. ~Phyllis Diller
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Dad, you're someone to look up to no matter how tall I've grown. ~Author Unknown
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You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely. ~Ogden Nash
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When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years. ~Author unknown, commonly attributed to Mark Twain but no evidence has yet been found for this (Thanks, Garson O'Toole!)
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Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope. ~Bill Cosby
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Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest. ~Larry Lorenzoni
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When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. ~Mark Twain
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Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. ~Bob Hope
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There is still no cure for the common birthday. ~John Glenn
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Old as she was, she still missed her daddy sometimes. ~Gloria Naylor
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Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. ~George Bernard Shaw
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Are we not like two volumes of one book? ~Marceline Desbordes-Valmore
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There's something like a line of gold thread running through a man's words when he talks to his daughter, and gradually over the years it gets to be long enough for you to pick up in your hands and weave into a cloth that feels like love itself. ~John Gregory Brown, Decorations in a Ruined Cemetery, 1994
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When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. ~Mark Twain
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May you live to be a hundred yearsWith one extra year to repent.~Author Unknown
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A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip. ~Author Unknown
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A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again. ~Enid Bagnold
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Sherman made the terrible discovery that men make about their fathers sooner or later... that the man before him was not an aging father but a boy, a boy much like himself, a boy who grew up and had a child of his own and, as best he could, out of a sense of duty and, perhaps love, adopted a role called Being a Father so that his child would have something mythical and infinitely important: a Protector, who would keep a lid on all the chaotic and catastrophic possibilities of life. ~Tom Wolfe, The Bonfire of the Vanities
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May you live to be a hundred yearsWith one extra year to repent.~Author Unknown
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A father carries pictures where his money used to be. ~Author Unknown
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Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. ~Herbert Asquith
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Dad, you're someone to look up to no matter how tall I've grown. ~Author Unknown
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Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. ~Herbert Asquith
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It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. ~Phyllis Diller
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We advance in years somewhat in the manner of an invading army in a barren land; the age that we have reached, as the saying goes, we but hold with an outpost, and still keep open communications with the extreme rear and first beginnings of the march. ~Robert Louis Stevenson, "Virginibus Puerisque II," Virginibus Puerisque, 1881
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Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest. ~Larry Lorenzoni
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Henry James once defined life as that predicament which precedes death, and certainly nobody owes you a debt of honor or gratitude for getting him into that predicament. But a child does owe his father a debt, if Dad, having gotten him into this peck of trouble, takes off his coat and buckles down to the job of showing his son how best to crash through it. ~Clarence Budington Kelland
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I don't care how poor a man is; if he has family, he's rich. ~M*A*S*H, Colonel Potter
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Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier. ~Dan Bennett
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Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope. ~Bill Cosby
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Sherman made the terrible discovery that men make about their fathers sooner or later... that the man before him was not an aging father but a boy, a boy much like himself, a boy who grew up and had a child of his own and, as best he could, out of a sense of duty and, perhaps love, adopted a role called Being a Father so that his child would have something mythical and infinitely important: a Protector, who would keep a lid on all the chaotic and catastrophic possibilities of life. ~Tom Wolfe, The Bonfire of the Vanities
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Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed. ~Charles Schulz
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Father! - to God himself we cannot give a holier name. ~William Wordsworth
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Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician. ~Author Unknown
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Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. ~George Bernard Shaw
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Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ~Elizabeth Stone
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Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990
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